p.s.

but i sure know how to ruin everything

-Lnk-

give it up big apple

No love for no beach, baby that's law
But she doesn't see, therefore I spoil
I trick, I fall, run up in raw
I love her with all my heart
Every vein, every vessel, every bullet lodged
With every flower that I ever took apart
-Lupe Fiasco "The Coolest"

so today was cool.
people came over.
not too many.
i didn't want it to be a bajillion people running around.

at first it was a couple.
just 4.
we sat around and talked and had a good time laughing.
then some more showed up.
then some others.

we ate pizza,
swam in the lake,
played guitar hero
and ate some cake.

it was nice just celebrating 10 years of friendship.
and having other friends around.

but it will always happen.

"they say you can't always please everyone,
and last night all those people were at my show."
-the late great Mitch Hedberg

so yeah,
i'll make you frown.
even piss you off.

"i tried walking into Target and i missed."
-Mitch Hedberg

.target-attention.
.blikkish.

-Lnk-

step brothers

i couldn't think of another movie to watch,
to watch with my best friend of 10 years.
i haven't laughed that hard in a theater in a long time.
laughed till i cried.
honestly

we walked out of the movie at 2 am
but we couldn't stop laughing.

its good that things are ending this way.
on laughter.

tomorrow we are having our 10 year anniversary party.
we've been best friends for 10 whole years.
and he stood by my side through some crazy tough times.
and i look forward to our future.

i know he'll be off in school and i'll be here trying to finish up as soon as possible,
but we'll talk on the phone.
its just going to hurt.
not having my girl down here,
or my boy.

so i'll just have to keep active and positive.
its going to be tough.

but man,
that movie was hilarious.

i miss my baby so badly.
she called me a couple nights back and i was tired.
i've been crappy to her lately.
i've been treating her like i'm just putting up with her.
but this time away from her has shown me how much she means to me.

there are some times when i feel like honestly,
i'd rather lay down and just wait for the day to leave me behind.
i know if she were there, she pick me up
and gently encourage to do what i got to do.

she doesn't get back for another week,
and i need her now more than ever.

i just get so easily scared.

i know she'd make me feel safe.

.boats n hoes.

-Lnk-

its over

said Im gonna buy this place and burn it down
Im gonna put it six feet underground
He said Im gonna buy this place and watch it fall
Stand here beside me baby in the crumbling walls
Oh Im gonna buy this place and start a fire
Stand here until I fill all your hearts desires
Because Im gonna buy this place and see it burn
Do back the things it did to you in return
Ah,ah,ah
He said oh Im gonna buy a gun and start a war
If you can tell me something worth fighting for
Oh and Im gonna buy this place, thats what I said
Blame it upon a rush of blood to the head

And honey
All the movements youre starting to make
See me crumble and fall on my face
And I know the mistakes that I made
See it all disappear without a trace
And they call as they beckon you on
They say start as you mean to go on
Start as you mean to go on

He said Im gonna buy this place and see it go
Stand here beside me baby watch the orange glow
Somell laugh and some just sit and cry
But you just sit down there and you wonder why
So Im gonna buy a gun and start a war
If you can tell me something worth fighting for
Im gonna buy this place, thats what I said
Blame it upon a rush of blood to the head

And honey
All the movements youre starting to make
See me crumble and fall on my face
And I know the mistakes that I made
See it all disappear without a trace
And they call as they beckon you on
They said start as you mean to go on
As you mean to go on, as you mean to go on

So meet me by the bridge, meet me by the lane
When am I going to see that pretty face again
Meet me on the road, meet me where I said
Blame it all upon
A rush of blood to the head

.coldplay.

-Lnk-

i'm thinking

i'm thinking over something i had thought i knew before.
saw capote tonight.
it was good, but slow, but good.
found a renewed sense in coldplay.
they are good for nights of contemplation.

that sounded so stupid,
well i can be at times.
and i am now.

helping a friend out

.hurts you sometimes.

-Lnk-

baby come back

i didn't think i'd miss you this much,
but i need you back already.

i had it out today,
it felt good letting ____ know how i felt.
that doesn't happen much around here.
mainly because i just don't say anything.

but i'm going to the movies tonight to see a movie i don't really care for,
but its with a friend,
so it's all good.

baby come back

-Lnk-

long truck ride back

so we went to eat at my boi's house in boca,
quite a drive.
it was cool though.
had some good food and good convo.'s

on the way back, we kind of got in a fight.
it wasn't that i was mad at her,
just mad at the way she views herself.
i screamed at her,
yelled some obscenities.
its the only way i could get my point across.

i'm sorry

.i'mlame.

-Lnk-

know when to call it

know when to call it a day,
when its time to just go home.

when your lungs are burning with week old dust.

.go home.

-Lnk-

i will spend

"don't push me cause i'm close to the edge,
i'm trying not to lose my head."
-Mel E Mel

yeah so the show was awesome last night.
i'm still sick.
i wake up feeling like frankenstein.
my joints don't work,
my neck is crooked
and my spine feels 15 times to big for my body.

as the day wears on,
the pain wears off.

but the show was sick.
i enjoyed myself.
i have a lot to learn
and i'm ready to.

got to go to bed and make an attempt at sleep.
have work at 8am

yippy!!

-Lnk-

beyond the neon forest

martin luther king never changed the country.
he affected the people around him, and in doing so,
changed our nation.

i can vote for obama, mccain or ronald mcdonald.
they are not responsible for me.
i am responsible for me.
i cannot run to the government to take care of me.
i need to make sure i can provide for myself.

the government is here to protect us,
not to allow us to be lazy and have them make decisions for us.

i cannot and will never change my city, state, region etc.......
i can live and share with the people around me.

i can never save anyone.
the Holy Spirit changes peoples hearts.

we as a people, we as a nation
and even as far as we as a church;
will never impact our generation,
we will never change history
if we fail to see the people in front of us.

we are looking to far ahead into the future.
technically the future is always a second ahead of us.

if we stopped looking ahead and just looked into the eyes of those around us,
then we can learn about people,
share our pains and joys with them,
make memories, make inside jokes,
be real and live.

we need to stop worrying about getting our names into the history books,
we just need to recognize the folks God has allowed us to be with.

.rudcot.

-Lnk-

bomb it

went to waffle house late last night,
hung out with a good ole country friend of mine.

nearly passed out at work.

i miss when i had to write alot in these blogs.
but summer has been chill and allowed me to do the same.

i want to bomb so bad.
wish i was artistically inclined.

oh well, i can play guitar at least.

.cornbread.

-Lnk-

i cannot

i can't go to bed before 3 am.
its impossible

-Lnk-

breaking

maybe if i was a game,
bounced small round objects off my hand
and against walls.
maybe you'd be addicted to me?

.bitcrushedbreaker.

-Lnk-

practice, again

despite my best efforts to thwart today,
it was awesome.
we cranked out this four song medley.
the show is going to be sick.

but i will just keep turning my back on you.
you are pursuing me.
but some days i want you and others i could care less.

-Lnk-